It’s been approximately a year and half since I have started working. When you are a fresh pass-out and join a company with more than 1.3L employees it’s scary. I remember my first day walking in all suited up with halo of confidence around me and everything came shattering down the moment I saw these bald scalps just popping out from the top of the cubicles...
Ya so coming back… 1.3L employees means you are gonna have people of all categories around you and listed below are some of those categories:
1. Mr. Riddler:
These are the type of people who can’t have silence around them; they always have to break it by asking some question. picture this the dude walks up to your desk you look at him give him a customary smile and continue to peep into your desktop hoping that the next link you click is not blocked by websense… now the dude will start so you are an MBA naa… you would look at him and say "yes"... Heard yours is a good college… You reply trying to be modest "well yea but there are better colleges also"... then the awkward silence… broken again… what’s the fees?... reply: around 6-7L... well that is too much and that’s why I don’t want to do MBA...
The best thing being he will never question anything on Work it would always be on useless topics!!
2. Mr. Know All:
This kind of creature would most probably be an MBA.. Just because he has attended more GD than anyone else thanks to numerous attempts to get placed he would have an opinion on every damn topic. But the worst quality being at end of any catastrophe instead of helping he would reply "I knew, this was gonna happen... this was all wrong… it should have been this way" all you wanna say to that guy at that moment is dude shut the f*** up!!!
3. Mr. Superlative:
Ok since a couple of guys from workplace follow this blog let me give out a statutory warning: It’s not directed at any particular person… any resemblance to a person living or dead is purely coincidental....
This is the kind that makes you laugh... Everything with them has to be at the highest order... If you are discussing a tragic story.. the dude would say "Ye toh kuch nahi... mere saat ek baar naa..." and continue to rant about how badly his life sucks... on the other hand if you are discussing a happy event he would again start by saying "Ye toh kuch bhi nahi... ek baar naa...." so it’s like if you say you leave home at 8:00 to get office this dude has to say I leave at 7:55
Scenario 2: I went out with a couple of girls... ooh I went out with 6!!!... You say but the party sucked!!... Superlative dude say......"People were discussing saas bahu serials... could it be any bad"... Dude how about your company was bad and hence they had nothing else to do, to kill time!!! (Peace gandaa bhai)...
4. Mr. Always Right!!:
The most irritating kind... more or less gonna be your boss... There is no scope of having a dialog... it is gonna be a one way sermon... no debates only orders... But it’s an entertainment to watch when you have Mr. Know all and Mr Always right discussing (yelling)... Sparks are bound to fly...
5. Mr./Ms. Friendly:
Mr. Friendly would be the dude whose only job in the day would be to visit 10 different cubicles, once before lunch and once after lunch... This is the dude who is gonna have the most of the gossip... and since he has been so courteous towards you it would be in your agenda to meet him at his desk (if he is not on his round that is) while you go to the wending machine or loo... Can be one of the most resourceful people in office
Ms. Friendly... Well she is the one who would like to be a part of the all males club just to show the pretty women that she’s got the oomph.... Well the guys will just about accept any girl considering the male to female ratio...
6. Ms. Snob:
This would have to be the high expectations... career oriented woman... All she would be interested in is how to I become a better manager... and it would come naturally to her... would be a master in exploiting her feminine attributes... most of her chores would be done by unsuspecting IT nerds who would probably have only never sat beside a girl for 8 hours in a day...
7. Mr. Cool
Well I guess this is where I fit in :D… the one who thinks he does not belong to any of the above groups and is cool enough to write a blog on how he has to put up with some seriously un-cool shit everyday!!!
8. Pissing...
Aaah don’t know how to classify them... but these are the kind of dude who have to first unbuckle their belts then unbutton their trouser and then finally unzip it… All this just to pee!!!
I wonder what the hell they have at their crouch region, that they are forced to unbutton the trouser to pee... Aren’t their zippers big enough??!!
Well in case you feel if there are any more such creatures... do reply!!
3 comments:
Very well written post. Absolutely fluent and crystal clear thought process.
Looks like you had been doing a research about the topic. But it would have been fun had u given one example of each category except for Mr Superlative! [:P]
A lot like creatures in my college!
chooooo funny!!!!
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